Saturday, September 19, 2020

Stephen's Big Dig, Part 2

Stephen Orange sends in his latest report digging for marine fossils with the S.C.S.F.W.F (Sasha Consortium Searching for Weird Fossils)...

Stephen Orange: Hello everyone!  I'm along the shores of the great unsalted seas, looking for previously undiscovered fossils of ancient marine creatures.  We haven't had any luck on our earlier digs, but I am feeling hopeful for today!

Stephen: I think here, close to the water, will be a good spot to dig.

Stephen: Hmmf.  Our first find...only a Lepomis macrochirus. 
Ancestor of the common bluegill.  Bah.

Stephen: Well, an ammonite.  A little more interesting, but really they're ten-a-penny around here.

Stephen: Perhaps if we tried a little further away from the water.  Must remember 
to record all of this for posterity.

Stephen:  >GASP!<

Stephen: Can...can it be?  It looks like  Dunkleosteus!  Very rare; only 10 species known.  
We must dig it up and study it!

Stephen: Time for the trowel.  Must be very careful if I want to extract it whole.  Oooh, this is so exciting!  It's definitely Dunkleosteus, but I can't yet pinpoint the species.  I guess that will be my next project!  I do hope the S.C.S.F.W.F. will be pleased.

Stephen: Success!  Oh my goodness, there's so much to do!  Cataloging, measuring, weighing, reports to collate, articles to winter is booked!  
Can't wait to share with the others at home!

Congratulations to Stephen Orange!  We will leave him here with his 'trophy' and all the follow-up his endeavors will bring.  Doubtless we'll get a full report once he returns to Gregoropolis!  

Saturday, September 12, 2020

A Cure For the Fall Blues

Duncan: Gosh, look at the calendar.  Fall begins in less than two weeks!  In no time at all it will be winter...that's soooo depressing.  I wonder how everybody else copes with this time of year.

Kaveh: Actually, it's a chance to catch up on my reading.

Sasha: It's a great time to work on art projects.
Frederick: And play games!

Marta: We get to wear our fall and winter wardrobes.
Pamela: I think plaids will be trending this year.
Marta: I agree.

Tyler: Well, there's tobogganing and snow forts...
Mikko: ...and snowball fights and snow soccer.
Mikko and Tyler: Wintertime rocks!
Duncan: Snow soccer?

Wesley: Oh, we never think that far ahead.
Ezra: It distracts from the now.

Uli: Ach, I don't haff time to think about such things.

Alice: Well, whenever something troubles me, I twirl.
Duncan: You...twirl?
Alice: Yes, I twirl around as fast as I can, and it makes all of my worries fly away.
Duncan: And that really works?
Alice: Oh yes.  Holly Belle told me about it, and she's never wrong, you know.

Duncan: Well, here goes...

Duncan and Alice: WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

Alice: Feel better?
Duncan: Uhhhhh, I'll let you know when everything stops spinning.

Saturday, September 5, 2020

Stephen's Big Dig, Part 1

Daddy John: Stephen Orange is away, participating in a dig sponsored by the S.C.S.F.W.F. (Sasha Consortium Searching for Weird Fossils).  He's sending back his first report.

Stephen Orange: Every scientist/archaeologist has been assigned his or her own tent.  This is my little home for the duration of the dig.

Stephen: Everyone's tent was given a nickname.  Mine was wordplay based on my name.
"Casa de Naranja" means "House of the Orange."

Stephen: >Whew<  It's been a long day, we searched and dug from sun-up to sundown.

Stephen: >Aaahhh<  That's better.  Nice to have a bit of rest before dinner.  

Stephen: I'd best call home.  I know Nicholas Sahara will be pretending not to be worrying.

Stephen: Hello, Nicholas.
Nicholas Sahara: Well, Great Richard the III's ghost! Hullo Stephen!  How are you?  
How is the dig going?

Stephen: It's going pretty well.  I haven't had any luck as of yet, but I'm close to 
finding something big...I'm quite sure.  I just know it!
Nicholas: You can feel it in your bones, eh?  >Heh-heh<
Stephen: Er, yes, quite.

Nicholas: Stephen, Peter would like to say hello.
Pete Dakota: Hi Stephen Orange!  We all miss you!  'Specially Mikey and Connor!
Stephen: Tell them I miss them, too.  I'll be home before too long.

Stephen: Nicholas, they're ringing the bell for dinner.  I have to go now.  
Nicholas: Please ring again with updates.  Good luck, old bean!

Stephen: >Sigh<  Soon, surely?  Very soon.  I can indeed feel it 'in my bones.'
Maybe tomorrow...?


Saturday, August 29, 2020

The Birds & The Bees

Bowie: So that's how you change a diaper!
Ann Marie: Yes.  And if you occasionally helped Nanny Wendy with Connor's diapers, 
you would know that.
Bowie: Well, you guys seem to have everything under control.
Meghan: Hmmph!
Connor: Ba ga koo!

Bowie: Hey, what's that?!
Meghan: >whispering<  That is s-e-x.
Bowie: Sex?!?
Connor: Blx!

Meghan: Shh!  Not so loud!
Ann Marie: Didn't you know?
Bowie: I always thought sex was...uh, well...I'm not sure what I thought.
But I didn't think it was that.
Meghan: Yeah, that's what it is.  Kind of surprising, isn't it?
Bowie: Boy, I'll say.
Connor: Oook flep poka.

Ann Marie: Apparently baby girls have sex too, but it looks a little different.
Bowie: But, uh, we don't have sex?
Meghan: Oh no, as near as we can guess, it eventually just goes away by itself.
Ann Marie: Like a pimple.
Bowie: Well that's a relief.  I'm really surprised though; the big people
 always act like sex is such a huge deal.
Connor: Blaa!

Meghan: Does anything the big people say or do ever make sense?
Ann Marie: It's true.  I'm afraid the big people are rather clueless.
Bowie: I guess you're right.
Connor: Eeep.

Meghan: It's probably best that we not mention this conversation to the others.
Ann Marie: It would just upset them.
Bowie: Oh, for sure.  I mean Connor's just a little baby.  It's not his fault that he has sex.
Connor: Gah!

Saturday, August 22, 2020

Dress For Success

Daddy Steve:  We recently bought a dashing Gregor suit, dress shirt, & tie combo off of eBay.

It was made, some time ago we would guess, by someone named Aunt Dinah.  A number of her creations turned up on eBay at the same time.  We had never heard of her before, and apparently no one in the Sasha Facebook group had either.

Whoever Aunt Dinah was, she was an excellent seamstress.  The tailoring is impeccable and the jacket is fully lined.

Giancarlo took a fancy to the suit and claimed for himself.

Giancarlo: Italian men appreciate finely tailored suits.

He thought it made him look like a Wall Street tycoon.

Giancarlo: What did the Dow close at today?
Wyatt: Huh? 

We began to wonder if we had a similarly businesslike ensemble in the girls' wardrobe.  A search produced only this outfit which Valerie is wearing.  We think it would be suitable for the corridors of power...

Valerie: I'll be preparing a legal brief, if you need me.

We suspect that nowadays women have a wider variety of choices in business attire.  Gone are the 1980s when giant shoulder pads commanded respect.

Valerie: Anyway, it's what's in your head that's important, not what you're wearing.
Giancarlo: Absolutely.

Of course, at the moment, this is actually what most folks are wearing to work...

Giancarlo: Do you think this robe needs a wash?
Valerie: >sniff, sniff<  Mmmm...maybe.

Saturday, August 15, 2020

Wardrobe Malfunction

Daddy Steve: There appear to be some sneaky shenanigans afoot in Gregoropolis...

Holly Belle: Now, does he understand what he's supposed to do?
Meghan: Oh yes, he's quite clear on that.  He brought up the issue of compensation again.
Holly Belle: He needn't worry.  If everything goes according to plan, he'll get what's due him.

Rhoda: Hey, what's going on here?
Meghan: Never mind, Rhoda.
Holly Belle: Yes Rhoda, you just run along.

 Meanwhile, in the boys' room...

Frank: Hey, John Martin.  Whatcha doin'?
John Martin: Changing clothes.  Somebody got jam all over one of the kitchen chairs 
and I sat in it.
Frank: >Tsk, tsk<  There are some careless folks around here.  You're gonna wear that?
John Martin: Yeah, why?

Frank: Well, it's not really up to par for a smart looking chap like yourself.  Why don't you wear this?  For looks, you can't beat a man in nautical wear.  That's what I always say.
John Martin: I've never heard you say that.  In fact, I've never heard you talk about fashion at all.
Frank: Well, then dig the potatoes outta yer ears.  No,no, you put this on.  Trust me, it's your look.
John Martin: Oh, all right.

John Martin: At last, some peace and quiet.
Holly Belle: ♫♫ Ooooh John Marrrr-tinnnn ♫♫
John Martin: >Sigh<

Holly Belle: Oh, there you are.  I... >gasp< what an astonishing coincidence!  
Our outfits match!  Can you believe it?!?
John Martin: Yipe!

Holly Belle: Of course, this just proves what I've always said: what a handsome and well-matched couple we make!  Let's go out to the garden and have someone take our picture.
John Martin: Well, I...ah..ah... >sigh<

Meghan: Here you go, as promised.
Frank: Thanks.  Pleasure doing business with you.

Rhoda: Wow, Frank.  You sold your brother out for a cake?  That's pretty harsh.
Frank: >chomp, snarf, chomp<  Want a piece?
Rhoda: ...  >shrug< ...sure.