Saturday, January 25, 2020

Blogcation


We've had some recent sad news at Gregoropolis, so we'll be on a short break while taking care of family and other things.  We'll be back in a week or two.  

Sunday, January 19, 2020

Mastering the Art of French Cooking


Giancarlo: Ciao, Emile!  You're just in time to help set the dinner table.  We've made everyone's favorite: spaghetti.
Emile: Sacre bleu! Not ze spaghetti again!

>collective gasp<
Gino: What's wrong with spaghetti?!?
Giancarlo: Spaghetti is good for you!
Angelo: You wouldn't be so small if you ate more spaghetti!

Emile: Non, mes amis, eet ees because I do not have ze delicious French food that I am wasting away!  Why can we not have more of ze cuisine fran├žais in zis 'ousehold?
Giancarlo: Because French cooking is too fussy and complicated.
Emile: Zat ees where you are wrong.  Come, let me show you.

Anthony: "Mastering the Art of French Cooking by Julia Child."  I've seen her on TV.  I think it was a program about making omelets for 300 people in 15 minutes, or something like that.*

*Season 1, episode 4.  Original air date February 23, 1963

Emile: Now, look at zis recipe.
Anthony: 'Boeuf Bourguignon.'  Hmm, actually that doesn't sound too difficult.
Emile: Not at all; even for ze non-Fran├žais
Giancarlo: Hmmmf.

And so the boys get ready to cook.  However, complications soon arise...

Anthony: Uh-oh.  The recipe calls for bacon.  We forgot to get that at the supermarket.
Gino: I found this in the pantry.  What do you think?

Emile: Imeetation bacon bits?! Madame Child would turn over in 'er grave, that ees what I think.  Non, non, non.  I will return to ze store for ze bacon while the rest of you continue with ze preparations.  Tsk-tsk!

Giancarlo: We have another problem.  I checked in the basement and we don't have any French red wines.
Anthony: Oh dear.  I knew this was going to be more complicated than we thought.
Gino: Aren't we a little young to be drinking wine anyway?
Anthony: It's fine.  The alcohol all burns off during cooking, but how are we going to solve this problem?

Angelo: Well, the recipe does say that you can use Chianti, and we have lots of that*.
Giancarlo: Ha-ha!  That's Italian wine!  Emile would never go for that!
Anthony: Well, what he doesn't know won't hurt him...

*Daddy Steve's favorite wine with pizza

Quite a while later...

Emile: I think eet ees ready to come out of ze oven.
Louisette: Oh mon petit lemon, eet smells magnifique!  Just like maman used to make!

And after dinner...

Giancarlo: I must admit, that was delicious.
Emile: But of course, mon ami.  Eet ees ze wonderful French wine zat ees ze secret ingredient!
Giancarlo: You know what, Emile? For once I agree with you! >hee-hee<



Saturday, January 11, 2020

There's No Such Thing As A Minnesota Snow-Ape

Benjamin Roy: Wait a minute.  Tell me that again.
Megan: BR, we know what we saw!
Daphne: Yes!  There's a monster prowling around the backyard!

Rhoda: I saw it too!  I would have kicked its behind, but, um, the other girls were too scared, so we ran right back into the house.

BR: Alright, alright...I'll grab Pete and we'll go outside and take a look around.
Daphne: Oh, thank you BR!  You two be careful!

Pete Dakota: What exactly are we doing?
BR: I told you; Megan, Daphne, and Rhoda say they saw something sneaking around out here.  Rhoda thinks it was a Minnesota Snow-Ape.
Pete: A S-s-snow-Ape?! >gulp<  D-d-do you believe in those?
BR: No, I don't.  But it will make the girls feel better if we investigate.
Pete: Oh, O-o-okay.

BR: Hey!  What's this?
Pete: What did you find?
BR: I don't know.  We'll give it to Stephen Orange to examine.

Stephen Orange: >mutter, mutter<  I don't know why they gave this to me.  I'm a marine biologist, not mammalian.  >grumble, grumble<
Nicholas: Hullo Stephen, whatever are you up to?
Stephen: >And I hate being interrupted, sigh<  I am examining a piece of fur BR and Pete found in the backyard.  >sigh<

Nicholas: Great Richard the III's Ghost!  I overheard some of the girls nattering on about this.  Do you think there is a mysterious local simian roaming the garden?
Stephen: >sigh<  There's no such thing as a Minnesota Snow-Ape.  This is probably just from a squirrel or a rabbit.

Nicholas: Still, awfully exciting, don't you think?
Stephen: No.  Make yourself useful; dump this flask out in the sink and wash it.
Nicholas: Oh dear, er, this isn't some sort of acid, is it?
Stephen: No, it's grape Kool-Aid.  I was drinking from it until I remembered I don't like grape Kool-Aid.

BR: Well, we haven't seen anything unusual.  I'll bet they just saw shadows on a mound of snow and their imaginations got the better of them.  Let's go in.
Pete: B-b-best idea all day.





Saturday, January 4, 2020

Ringing In The New Year

Daddy Steve: How did you ring in the new year?  Here at Gregoropolis, the kids were determined that they were going to greet 2020 right at the stroke of midnight.

Mikko: Daddy Steve, can we have a New Year's Eve party and stay up 'til midnight?
Daddy Steve: Hmm.  Do you really think you'll be able to stay awake that late?
Mikko: Oh sure we can!
Tyler: No problem!

Here's what really happened...

7:30 pm

8:30 pm

9:30 pm

Mikko: >Yawn<  I think he knew all along we'd never make it.
Tyler: Yeah, he's pretty smart for an old man.